The ability to understand and manage our emotions and the emotions of others is known as emotional intelligence. Furthermore, the idea is that this ability can greatly increase your chances of success in life. Science journalist Daniel Goleman popularized this concept in 1995, and it spread like wildfire.
Three skills exist within emotional intelligence: emotional awareness, the ability to take emotions and apply them to tasks, and the ability to regulate emotions. This regulation can be of your own and other people’s emotions. In other words, helping cheer up or calm down yourself or other people.
Self and social awareness are a big part of emotional intelligence. This is the ability to recognize and interpret the emotions of yourself as well as those around you. Reflection of your feelings, as well as pausing before you speak, are tell-tail signs of emotional awareness. Pausing allows you to evaluate the impact that your emotional state will have on your actions. Also, emotionally aware people demonstrate empathy. Their awareness helps them connect with people, and put themselves in the shoes of others. Being emotionally aware helps maintain healthy relationships. This goes hand-in-hand with keeping control of your thoughts. This then brings us to the regulation of emotions.
While we don’t have much control on the immediate appearance of negative emotions, we do have the ability to control our reactions to that emotion. Controlling your thoughts allows you to analyze the situation rationally, as well as keep your emotions in check. People skilled in regulating their emotions accept criticism better, learning from it opposed to letting it affect their work or attitude. They are typically more authentic in their approach to life and relationships, as they communicate how they are feeling.
The Affect of Emotional Intelligence on Relationships
People that are emotionally aware and good at regulating their emotions tend to have better relationships with those around them. They also gain more respect from authority figures. When you are emotionally mature, you give positive feedback opposed to negative, you don’t have a problem apologizing, and you can forgive and forget easier. In other words, valuing a relationship over your own ego is key. Forgiveness allows you to take control of your own emotions, and not let them hold you hostage. This skill also keeps the wool from being pulled over your eyes. You are able to see other’s intentions clearer.